Wednesday, August 11, 2010


That's how I feel today. Just BLAH! I did some yoga, some strength training and some Wii, but I am not sure my heart was in it. I feel like I am stuck. Every time I make progress, I take two steps back.

I want to lose weight. I want to be healthy. I just feel like I keep hitting a wall. I am still working toward my goal but I am not having as much confidence that I'm going to make it.

I wanted to do a cleanse from the book I'm reading. I got the supplies and I did really well all day yesterday even though I was starving and weak. Until last night. I had only had 480 calories (8 servings of black grapes) all day and water. I was shaking. At the time I felt like I needed to eat something else or I was really going to hurt myself. So I ate. Then came the guilt. I still feel guilty today. I feel like I gave up. I did read further in my book and realized I am probably not in a healthy condition to do that but I can't help but feel guilty. So this morning my little son was eating a donut and so I had a few little donut holes too (total emotional eating). Now the guilt has compounded.

Even though I am feeling rather BLAH, I will make this a good day. I will eat healthy and make sure that my calories are in range and also that I am exercising the way I know I need too. I must keep pressing forward.

This is me pushing back t

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